post for 25

today WAS a fuckin great day since I'd done my presentation, and to me, it is a perfect presentation in 5 minute of my life.Eventhough im not that good enough, but i'd throw all my heart and blood in it, I'm satisfied. ^^

and today, is yuen keii's bufday...soo pity that having to birthday during the exam huh??haha hopefully i can attend ur celebration la...^^ btw sang yat fai lok!!!

However, the cheeriness should stop at the moment.
everything turn up side down once i get into room...i heard something from my bro which is the phrases i dislike the most
"i don't want to live in a mountains on RUBBISH..."
in the past few weeks, I'd forgotten wtf they were arguing with, i mean my bro and dad were in 1 side and going against me la...
but as what i remember is, something ridiculous was spamming out from their fucking mouth
dad:"Hai yan lai de zhe ge...mei you yong liao de, fei wu lai de"
【all the bad terms in chinese or cantonese was continually comin out from his mouth】
bro:"yea la, i tahan very long ad, useless and hopeless liao de la him"
【i tell u, my bro was treating me so fuckin nice before it】
【 but at that moment, i realized its all illusion】
【he is pretending all the time...although i don't know wtfuckin purpose he is havin】

so now let me conclude all the fuckin bullshit stuff they said is~
im totally useless and hopeless at all, i have to stress the word USELESS

im OK with this word actually, it suits me a lot...
i was lying to myself all the time that im not useless as i did lastime, i'd grown [i guess]
in UTAR, i pay so much effort on doing all the presentations, assignments, all i want to do is get their recognize, however i realized, its just not enough...i fed up on telling them im useful, because its just not enough...im totally "tak boleh pakai" to them...a fucking failure under the comparison with the other 2 kids of him...
NO MATTER HOW WELL I'VE DONE, AS LONG AS MY ROOM IS MESSY, I WILL BE CLASSIFIED INTO A VEYR VERY USELESS CATEGORY...

My stuff is messy, i admit that im useless also la...i dont even manage my books, papers baik baik...im enjoy living sleeping in this fuckin mess SO WHAT!!!
I respect u alot ad right? i never ever say that ur things is RUBBISH!!
yea imma rubbish, but my stuff NOT AT ALL!!! they have their own meaning to me!!
u can disrespect to me, but to my drawings or comic, u are not forgivable at all...
u dont have the right to say that im show no respect to u, please think of what u hv done to me NOW

before this, i was passin through some of those, who used to be my best friends' facebook pages...im not gonna mention about them...im wondering why the relationship will turn into this awkward condition, from brotherhood, to strangers that won't even make a greet to me...
yea i might know the truth, it might because of, i was betrayed them from their trustfulness and not just once....or other reasons...im just hidin myself from it, all i know is im so unforgivable...
how many years, i dint reli look into their eyes...
each time i feel resentful and jealous, when im lookin in their photo...they were laughing amusedly...without me...

我知道现在完全不是打blog的时间，因为现在是十一点== 明天还有8点的课，marketing 的tutorial question 都还没有做== 一直在看不良仔与眼镜妹……

之前好好的One Piece海贼王的blog skin居然这样就坏了==，没有变，我就先用bleach的顶一下，很难看我知道，我尽早换掉它==