untitled again

OK Guys is me over here again...Now, is already the fxxkn last week of this sem, which means the fxxkn Final Exam of Sem 1 is around the fxxkn corner.
However, i still cant figure the fxxk out why im still here with my fxxkn FACEBOOK!!! i should be with my fxxkn text book now... u_u feel fxxkingly guilty at this moment la weii , any medicine can cure me from fxxkn addiction of facebook??

Sorry for the fxxk word...i've gone sohai ad...

The song of my blog "love the way you lie" by Eminem ft. Rihanna, I will gone extremely EMO no matter how many times I listen to it... A lot of thoughts will go through my mind, all those bad memories that I used to forget...
Something actually happened during last night's pasar malam, it makes me truely down... and when i pass by the pirate CD store beside the pasar malam, the song was played.... it makes my mood worst...

5 years, I have been trying my best to hide myself from the fact that, I'm a son of a deputy headmistress...
I don't feel happy at all, but guilty on being a son of deputy headmistress...
It might be a good thing for those who are talented or good in studies, since teachers will praise you and say"哇～不愧是老师的儿子～" and it will make your mom proud.
In common sense, a son of a teacher must always perform well in studies right?
However, the treatment will totally change when the same condition appeared at a lazy, useless or a mediocre student...and fortunately, I'm the one...
I was sensitive when people talk about my mum is a deputy headmistress, since most of them dont say good thing about it... all they will be sure is to say "你妈妈做么会有你这样的儿子"
.....
I dont get it. I will be the only one that get scolded extremely bad when I've done something wrong, is it because of my mum? Is it just because I wasn't as good as other teacher's son performed? I dont feel good... and I dont have much friend, because of my mum again...
Everyday, again and again, people will pay more attention on those bad things I did, and they will not notice other good things I did, then scold me with the same sentence...
Finally I've gone through my dark primary days. And I decided to downplay the fact from others during my secondary life, yet I was still sensitive with that sentence.

Until today, I had successfully enter a university, and I did very well in every task of my coursework. I dont think people will ever say such words to me again. In fact, I'll make my mom feel proud of me.
HOWEVER, no matter how good I've done, it is not enough... because my friend, which consider as a close friend of mine, she said the same thing to me, same words, with same tone. I ain't gonna mention her name here, it doesn't important...
It might be a fact... I'm still a shame of my mum... I'm a failure...